I bathe in a washtub
surrounded by grass and weeds
I take buckets of water
pour them over my head
and act as if A God
is purifying my sins
but these riches are
damned by the poorest
of bastards with souls
as cold as the leather
they wish their daddies
beat them with. They learned
pain is love and I ain't
talking about the sting
of discipline
of discipline
©2015
Anthony Desmond Scott. All Rights Reserved.
*For dversepoets - MTB .
It feels great to write without thinking again.
I really want to take my work in a more natural
direction: smoother similes and less
choppy metaphors while staying true to my core.
Not saying the super complex writer in me is dead,
I just want to be great at both styles.
21 comments:
Pain is love.. that is really something to build the story from.. love the bathtub, confined yet open when its filled with weed. Great writing Anthony.
I like your style here, Anthony....your crisp and clear style here, your evocative metaphors!
A nice switch-up, Anthony, powerful imagery with stentorian tones without the bitch-slap of street vernacular. I never knew my father, just a string of stepfathers, all assholes.
felt the depth of this and great visuals in the lines
Complex or biting, melodic or atonal, you have a large toolbox at your disposal. This ablution sets a mythic atmosphere. I had to learn to unknot the love is pain tangle. Superb!
"cold as the leather
they wish their daddies
beat them with"
What a provocative line. The emotional sting in this far out weighs the physical one.
I do like this. Your poem is like the cold water of the bath - clean and makes me draw a quick intake of breath as if I had been under that cold water as it poured from the bucket. A wonderfully masculine poem without posturing. Excellent work and I do believe, it is my favorite of yours so far.
Anthony your writing here is gold and straight from the heart.
I always love and enjoy your words, mind, and soul that you put into your work.
Bravo! my friend. :)
I like how what you make us see is more than the image you create. Your words conjure up a whole backdrop where our imagination also plays a role.
I like the depth, but simplicity, of this poem. And it had a great visual effect as well.
I think it's good as a poet to sometimes just let the words flow, but it is also good to tackle the complexity of forms or longer poems. Variety is good. Peace, Linda
Pain is love, how that stings ~ Admire the crisp & sharp verses Anthony ~
Grace
And yes.. truly for some folks pain is as close to feeling something at all that they can experience..
And i suppose that is the saddest part of human
nature than cannot be felt..
with pain or not...
Succinct and deep!
This flows naturally; effectively conveys the sting of pain and the damage done.
Clear and succinct, yet powerful. The sting of discipline is something I remember well from my childhood, and it did me no harm.
Simplification is good. We all need to go back to basics adn natural inspiration at times. I'm sure the complex poet is still there inside, but he's just being given a holiday!
Such a strong beginning image and a powerful follow thru - happy you are writing again, Anthony!
Wow..I've read others on the same topic and this one stands out and above those! That kind of pain no one deserves.
powerful and captivating words.
This is a tough write, Anthony, presented full-face and unadorned by sentimentality. Powerful.
You write, "It feels great to write without thinking again. "
So I don't have to listen and look for meaning - instead, I can just enjoy the collage of loose sounds and images. It is also a break for me to not have to feel an obligation to read a poem over and over to try to find the meaning.
I liked your collage -- it would be fun to see any one image explored.
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